Unfufilled Love
by Slash-enchanted
Summary: ONESHOT. Percy has loved his older brother Bill for a long time. When Percy finally tells Bill, how will he respond? Will he love him back, or will Percy's love be unfufilled? PWBW slash


Disclaimer--Yeah yeah we all know I'm not JK Rowling.  
  
Warnings--contains incest and slash. Read at your own risk. You've been warned.  
  
A/N--Well this is my first Percy fic. I've always liked Percy(and Bill too) and I hope this fic does justice to them both. Please review Thankyou.  
  
Twenty two year old Percy Weasley lay on the soft blue couch of his flat in London, twirling the glass of wine in hand absentmindedly, staring at the way the liquid swirled around, but not really seeing it. He was currently deeply lost in his thoughts, as he often was. How long had it been since he had last seen his family? Since he had left them without any known reason other than loyalty to Fudge? Three years...four? He couldn't quite remember. It didn't matter. Nothing mattered anymore to him. He had been demoted a while back and he hadn't cared. He had been too 'distracted' as Fudge called it. And perhaps...no he was most definitely right. He had been distracted. And by the most unthinkable source. It wasn't a beautiful girl with soft breasts and curved thighs. No, it was a long, red-haired, earring wearing source that had managed to get Percy's attention.  
  
He wasn't completely sure what event had made him fall for Bill. Maybe it was the time when he was five and had caught chicken pox. Bill had sat up with him all night to give his parents a break. Percy always remembered with a smile how Bill had read stories to him and how he had gently rubbed the soothing lotion on his back and on his chest to make the itching fade. And Bill had done it all with a smile on his face and without a complaint.  
  
Or then again, it may have been the time that Percy was ten and was once again being left behind for some event (Percy couldn't quite remember...it may have been quidditch though) that the rest of the family had just assumed Percy didn't want to go to...and didn't want him to go. They had asked, but the twins made such a fuss of him going that he had just said he had better things to do. Bill offered to stay behind and watch the boy, even though Percy could tell that Bill had really wanted to go. Bill had spent the entire day with him and Percy had actually had fun for once.  
  
Bill had always been one of the only people to actually do things for Percy without reason or without being told to. To do things only to make Percy happy, not for any personal reasons other than that. Bill was also the only one who had ever made him feel...special. Like he meant something. His mum and dad tried he knew it...but they never really knew anything about him at all. His other brothers and sisters never really cared either. Charlie had also had his own interests in his mind and shot for them. The twins had always viewed him as uptight and prissy...but they had never even given him a chance. Ron was trying to make a name for himself and Ginny just never really understood. But Bill...Bill had always given him a chance.  
  
When Percy was eleven, he had begun to see things about Bill that he hadn't seen before. The way the older boy's hair blew in the wind when he was flying on a broom. The way sweat glistened on his chest as he worked shirtless out back in the garden. The way tiny droplets of water would cling to him after a swim in the lake outside their house.  
  
Percy began to find excuses to follow his brother around. He somehow managed to leave his book behind, he needed to do some research on the place Bill was going...oh and his favorite was the 'I got lost and ended up here' one for when he had first started Hogwarts.  
  
Soon the dreams began. The dreams always started differently but always ended up the same....with Bill thrusting deeply into him, whispering into his ear as his younger brother moaned out his name. Whenever he awoke from those dreams he would find himself sticky and feeling a mix of contentment, confusion and shame. The first time it happened, he had woken up a few of his roommates, which had embarrassed him to no end. Luckily they didn't hear the name he had moaned, or he would never ever hear the end of it. From then on he cast a silence charm around his bed before he went to sleep to ensure the sanctity of his dreams never reached the ears of others.  
  
After a while it got extreme. He thought the dreams would end after a while...especially after Bill left. But things only got worse. The dreams were more frequent and more powerful. He tried everything he could think of to get his mind off the man he wasn't supposed to feel anything other than brotherly towards. He immersed himself in his studies, trying to keep his mind only on school. When that failed he decided to replace his brother with someone else. Penny seemed all right at the time. She was intelligent like he was and it undoubtedly seemed like a perfectly good pairing. Only it wasn't. Whenever he ran his fingers through her hair, he'd always think of how Bill's hair would feel under his fingers. Whenever he kissed her, he could only think of how Bill's lips would feel. Whenever he ran his fingers down her arms, he would only think of Bill's muscular arms. It didn't take Penny long to figure out that he wasn't too interested in her and she dumped him. Percy couldn't care less.  
  
In the summer after he had finished his seventh year, Bill came home for almost the entire summer. Usually he could only come for a few days, a week tops since his work kept him busy, but this year he had managed to get away for the entire summer since he was transferring and they didn't need him at his new location until the fall. Percy could barely even look at him. It was a good thing he had taken a job at the Ministry (which was another attempt to forget Bill) and had the excuse of working on reports to keep him busy. Work also gave him something to talk about at the dinner table. As long as he babbled about how work went, he could almost forget about how the object of his obsession was sitting right across from him. Almost.  
  
The next year the events with the Triwizard tournament occurred, leaving everyone, including him, more than a little shaken. A boy had died. Voldemort was supposedly back. On top of that Bill had told the family he would probably move back with them. Percy couldn't take it. It was too much for his brain to handle. He had to leave and he had to do it quick. He loved Bill with all his heart, but knew he couldn't tell him that. It was wrong. Bill would hate him. But it was too hard to be around Bill if he couldn't say how he felt. So he decided to leave. Detach himself from his family. That way, at least his family could hate him for a reason that wouldn't completely sicken them. And maybe...just maybe if he left everything...he could finally forget about Bill.  
  
So he got into in argument with his father about something trivial that Percy pretended to care about. He found a cheap flat in London to stay in, which was about as far away he could get without quitting his job. Percy finally began to think he could get over Bill. But it wasn't so. No matter how immersed he got himself at work...no matter how far away from his family he took himself...his red-haired object of affection remained with him. Percy began to get depressed and just stopped caring about things all together. And that was how he ended up writing the letter.  
  
Percy was brought out of his reverie by a loud knock on the door. Was it already three? He sighed and set the glass of swirling wine on the coffee table and stood. He smoothed out his unkempt hair the best he could and walked over, trying to prepare himself for the person behind the door. All the rehearsed words left his head as he opened the door to see the familiar face, the familiar red hair, the familiar earring, the familiar arms and the letter Percy had written to his familiar object of affection. Bill looked at him curiously for a few seconds before taking a step forward, looking at Percy and Percy looked back, staring deeply into the depths his eyes.  
  
"May I come in?" He asked, sounding a little unsure. Percy was pulled back out from Bill's eyes quickly.  
  
"R-right...of course..." Percy said quietly as he backed up, leading Bill into the small living room. Bill stepped in, taking a few glances around the room. Percy motioned for him to sit down on the couch that he was moments before laying on and Bill complied, looking confused.  
  
"What exactly do you want Percy? I thought you made it clear that you wanted nothing to do with us three years ago. And now I get a letter from you saying you want to talk with me and to come here, but not to tell anyone about it. Percy...what the hell is going on?" He asked, souncing angry. Percy smiled sadly and sighed slightly. It was as he had feared. Bill did hate him. But that wouldn't stop him from telling him this.  
  
"Bill...look it's a bit of a long story, so...please just listen." Percy pleaded with his brother. Bill nodded and sat back on the couch, trying to get comfortable. Percy sighed again. Here went nothing.  
  
"Ever since I was little...you have always been the one I could turn to. You have always been here for me. Like how you're here now. I....I guess I should get to the point now shouldn't I...I didn't leave the family because of work. I believed he-who-must-not-be-named was back. I hated Fudge. Hell, I hated work. It was just an excuse to get away. You see, I have a secret that I haven't been able to tell until now. I-I'm not even sure if I'm completely ready to tell it now...but I can't go on living like this. I...I...I love you....but not in a way that I should. Not in a brotherly way. What I mean is...I...I'm in love with you Bill. A-a-nd....I have been....for a long time...I- I'm... sorry..." He said as his voice began to crack and years of tears that were held back streaked down his lightly freckled, pale face. Percy then fell to his knees weeping, scared to death that he'd lose the only thing he had to hold on to. The only thing he had ever been able to hold on to.  
  
Bill stared at his younger brother in complete disbelief. He stood up slowly and walked towards the sobbing Percy. He knelt down beside him and gathered him into his arms and held him tightly, as he used to do when they were much younger. Percy cried harder and hugged him close.  
  
"Perce...why didn't you tell me? I always told you not to keep things bottled up inside." Bill chided gently, rubbing Percy's back softly. The younger man looked up.  
  
"Y-you don't...hate me?" He asked in disbelief, not wanting to believe it. Bill smiled kindly and wiped the hair out of Percy's face.  
  
"Honestly...your hair's almost as unkempt as mine..." He murmured, resting his hand on Percy's cheek. Percy smiled a little, trying to ignore the waves of contentment flowing through his body at the touch of Bill's hand on his cheek. Bill's hand then gently cupped Percy's cheek and he leaned forward, capturing Percy's lips with his own. Percy gasped a little with shock, but soon kissed back, finally being able to taste Bill's lips. If this was a dream, he never wanted to wake up. They pulled away from each other a few moments later, Bill with a smile and Percy with that same look of disbelief on his face.  
  
"Percy...I love you too you silly git. I never paid any of our other siblings any attention. They just weren't as important as you were. You have always been special to me. When I found out you had left us, I just about died. You were always my Percy." Bill told him, nuzzling his neck.  
  
"I'll always be yours..." Percy muttered, taking in the scent of Bill's hair. It smelt of the same herbal shampoo he had always used. Bill wiped the remaining few tears off Percy's cheek. He then stood and helped Percy up.  
  
"Let's go someplace more comfortable." Bill suggested and when Percy nodded, he took his hand, smile on his face.  
  
"Wait...Bill...what are we going to do? I mean...no one can find out about this..." He said, the weight of reality falling back upon him. Bill smiled at him.  
  
"Let's not worry about that right now ok? Just know that I won't leave you and as long as you're willing to put up with a few hardships, I am." He told Percy, who nodded and leaned against him.  
  
"Now...where's your room?" He asked. Percy smiled, feeling a sort of security from Bill's words and pointed to the bedroom. Bill led them there, Percy's hand still in his. He lay Percy down and began to fulfill Percy's dreams. Soon though it was ended with how all his dreams were ended. With Bill thrusting into Percy and Percy moaning, muttering and screaming. Only this was different than the dreams because when it was over, Bill was still there next to Percy, holding him tightly in his arms, sleeping peacefully. Percy knew it wouldn't be easy for them to be together, but also knew he would rather die than to be split up from Bill again. Percy smiled at his older brother, feeling a content sort of tiredness settle within him.  
  
"I love you..." he whispered into the older red head's ear before closing his own eyes, confident that no matter what lay ahead, at least now had Bill to face it with. And that was really all he ever needed. 


End file.
